Of course, nothing is simple anymore. Apparently UPS Stores charge a one dollar ’sealing’ fee.

Yes. $1 for a piece of tape.

I did not react at first; the guy behind the counter was nice enough when he told me and I reached into my pocket without blinking.   Thing is, I did not have the cash in my pocket, I left it in the car. When he saw that I did not have it, I just got a blank stare and I turned to get it out of my cup holder.

Then it it hit me: I got out of line and hiked back to my car to hunt for $1 for a freaking piece of tape!!!!! WTF?

Suddenly mad, I walked several storefronts down to give Office Depot my money for tape.  I bought a roll of the good stuff, Scotch Packing Tape, 800 inches for $3.18, total.

I casually mentioned to the cashier my mission to avoid paying $1 for a piece of tape, when to my astonishment she replied, “It’s cheaper if you do it than buying a roll of tape”. Certainly if I were in rush she might be right, nonetheless; my heart sunk when she said that. I paid up and walked out, inspired to write this post.

This is exactly why this economy is in shambles; people don’t know the value of a dollar. No miss employee of Office Depot #0149, it is not cheaper to pay $1 for a piece of tape. Here’s why:

800 inches / 318 cents = .3975 cents/inch

I already had 3 inches, so UPS only needed to add 13 more inches to make for a secure package. But, let’s assume they did their due packing diligence and applied a full 16 inches of tape.

.3975 cents/inch * 16 inches = 6.36 cents.

Now, I’m no saint when it comes to math or saving money, but for crying out loud, this sealing fee is a rip off, this UPS store just lost a future customer, and corporate now has to deal with a negative blog post.

Update: UPS Corporate is watching.

I often check Google Analytics  to get an idea about this site’s traffic. Well apparently someone from UPS & Mailboxes Etc is reading from San Diego.

Google Analytics for 13-March-2009

Since I have your ear….The UPS Store/Mailboxes Etc is supposed to be the local face to your giant multi-national and highly profitable corporation. You are providing a service that I ultimately paid for. In this case, I paid Sony for warranty repair service, and they paid YOU for a return sticker. Within those costs, you need to include the occasional cost of providing whiney customers like me with an extra length of tape.

Since I am a small business owner, let me tell you how I’d have done things differently. If I saw that my customer didn’t have the cash in his pocket, I’d have given him the piece of tape with a wink & a smile. Better yet, after I gave him some of my free tape, I’d then offer to sell the customer a whole roll for home.  If I worked at UPS corporate, I’d make a deal with Scotch and co-brand some tape with my franchisee’s phone number & address. This way, UPS Store customers could PAY to know exactly where the UPS store is every time they use packing tape.

Thanks for listening, and you’re welcome for the ideas. If you need additional ideas, and boy am I full of them…I’m a cheap consultant